Bethany is due to make her appearance on Wednesday morning. We met with the doctors and midwife yesterday, and after much discussion and many tears, we decided to have a c-section rather than go for a natural birth. There were many factors - her head and abdomen continue to grow at a rapid rate due to excess fluid on the brain and in the kidneys. There was a chance of laboring for days and ending up with an emergency c-section. It was also quite unlikely that she would make it through an induction alive. At Monday's ultrasound, we could see that there is no fluid at all around her, to protect her from the contractions and compression. This will allow us to meet her, for her to be born alive, be baptized, and die in our arms, instead of in my womb.
We've set funeral arrangements for 10:00 am on Tuesday, August 9, at Saint Ursula Church in Parkville. Anyone is welcome to attend.
I'm struggling a bit to keep it together today. This is such a unique experience. I've never known when my babies would be born, nearly to the minute. With Peter we had some hope of hours, maybe even days if we were really lucky. Bethany will likely have only minutes. It's an indescribable feeling, and I am struggling to find that joy today that I want and need to have. I'm so grateful that she will be without pain, without deformities, in the arms of our Lord, just a day from now. But that isn't making her impending death any easier today.
As always, your prayers are so appreciated.
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